Last week the tennis world was dealt an unexpected surprise as Andre Agassi’s publisher released a disturbing preview of Agassi’s autobiography. It seems that one of the world’s most beloved players was a frequent user of crystal methamphetamine in the late 1990’s.
Our crack research staff has uncovered a source who claims to have met a person who is the cousin of a friend of a pizza delivery guy who has read an early draft of the autobiography. This source reports to the mighty RACQUETY-YAK blog team that the usage of illegal drugs and subsequent weave of lies is just the tip of the iceberg.
If our source is accurate, on November 9th, when the autobiography “Open” goes on sale, we may learn more shocking revelations that promise to keep an army of ATP tour PR professionals busy for weeks. In a rare move, the code of silence is broken and dirt is dished on many of Agassi’s contemporaries. We have an exclusive preview of these revelations for our blog readers.
– In Chapter 3 we learn Jim Courier was a poker buddy of Bruno Rebeu (Famous French Tennis Umpire). Jim and Bruno regularly yukked it up at private monthly poker parties. Bruno would introduce a disguised Courier to participants as “Harvey…Carrot top’s older brother.”
– In Chapter 5 it is unveiled that Pat Cash smuggled Cuban cigars to many major tournament executives in exchange for favorable draws, start times and court assignments. He also enjoyed playing tennis in the buff.
– Chapter 7 supposedly reveals that Stefan Edberg tortured kittens. Who’d have thought?
– In Chapter 8 we learn Boris Becker listened to Shania Twain songs repeatedly on his walkman to mentally prepare for matches.
– Chapter 10 details Michael Chang as a reputed ladies man.
– The 11th Chapter features claims that James Scott Connors secretly enjoyed bubble baths and pedicures the evening before big matches.
– Chapter 12 gives the lurid details of Ivan Lendl’s private hell. He was stalked and referred to as “Man Candy” by supermodels Naomi Campbell, Claudia Schiffer and Cheryl Tiegs. They pursued him relentlessly. (Apparently Chang wasn’t their type).
– Chapter 15 describes Gilbert as a hell of a coach in spite of his twisted hobbies. We learn Gilbert was a serial peeper who documented his peeps on film. Agassi describes Gilbert’s collection of images as quite “eclectic” but is most disturbed by his extensive collection of former Oakland Raider players and executives.
Assuming our source is correct, this autobiography is going to sizzle. We can’t wait for November 9th and hope you enjoyed this exclusive preview of what may be coming.